Dear Joli

I know you are only two-years-old. I remind myself of this fact about every thirty seconds. But I am fairly certain you are doing every thing you can to see if Mommy will actually lock you in your bedroom for the remainder of your lifespan.

If you need some time to think about whether or not you want some thing, please say "I need a minute". Don't scream at the top of your lungs that you want it and then when I give it to you, throw it at me and scream that you don't want it.

If you want to play with your toys, please play to your hearts content. But when it's time to clean up, clean it up. Don't throw yourself in the middle of the floor and scream because you can't.

If you want to ride your bike, put your feet on the pedals and then push. Don't put your feet on the pedals, pretend like you pushed, and then scream loud enough that every one in Coronado thinks I'm trying to shove a scorpion down your throat.

Please, I'm begging you just make up your mind. I'm a fairly reasonable person. If you tell me you want oatmeal for breakfast, then that's what I'll make. But I'm very tempted to stop feeding you because even if you asked for it, you still throw yourself on the floor and scream that you don't want it.

I've tried giving you more individual attention but somehow that only seems to make things exponentially worse! So I try to opposite approach. We go to the gym, you get time away from me and I get a break from the screaming. I come back to get you feeling happy, relaxed, and ready for more screaming. Your teachers tell me that you had to have a time out because you tried to choke some one!!!

I will always love you, but you need to move past this stage, NOW!!!! Mommy's running out of chocolate and wine!!

Love, Mommy